Hos, bros, bats, clowns, etc! In order to organize my shit and post on here consistently—and to communicate with all y’all; there’s a bunch of you—I have finally created an e mail for this account! I will eventually chat you peeps up and, I don’t know, maybe learn how to use google+ or some nonsense?

Email comments, crits, questions to:

holybatjunkbatman@gmail.com

Picture unrelated; it’s just the best thing in the world.

Welcome, new followers! Looking around, there’s a lot of you…when did that happen? Awesome, guys, awesome. I am ever surprised and gratified. I am. <3

I am also currently the worst bat blog mod EVER. This is my last week of classes, though; finals are next week… so after that, I should be a steady internet presence. Just hold out till then!

To tide you over, I sourced this awesome art for you.

I love how Batman’s color scheme is preserved in the arm warmer gauntlets and stockings, don’t you? And he’s in PEARLS. Think about what a warped little touch that would be, if Bruce ever saw this.

ifuckinglovebatman:

dcu:

Is this:

• A: The son of a billionaire’s bedroom.
• B: Concept art for Bruce Wayne’s new Batcave in The Dark Knight Rises.
• C: Taiwanese Hotel room used mainly for “sexy time”

CLICK HERE to find out the answer.

Someone please go over this room with a black-light. I am willing to bet that the tumbler and posters of Bale!Bats will be the most, ahem, lit up.

I MUST GO HAVE SEXYTIMES HERE. I MUST. NEW LIFE GOAL.

IT’S A TUTU. A BATMAN TUTU. TO BE CLEAR: THAT IS A TUTU, WITH BATMAN ON IT.

What I love about running this blog is that I sometimes find things that I consider, upon first glance, highly improbable and very ridiculous, and then a second later I may very well be like, “Why not? Batman approves.”

It’s available in child AND adult sizes!

And really, doesn’t Batman approve of

1) fitness - both strength and coordination, which dancers develop - and,
2) Having everything come in basic black?

Black tulle! I want some bat ballet slippers in black leather and yellow bows! I will take up ballet for this. 

Also, there is a hidden Catwoman applique that shows once you start twirling!

BATMAN, AND STEALTH CATWOMAN? How is that not perfect? besides the Joker not being involved, I mean Kind of romantic. Seriously, I think Selina Kyle would be thrilled. Start ‘em young, and then they’ll make really great and limber buglers…

I’m finally posting these, even though they aren’t sharp—

These DO fold, though, which is pretty cool. Click the picture for a video and instructions on how to make your very own replica of the Arkham Asylum batarang. You COULD use the template to make one in metal, though…

If the dude with the functional Batman vambraces gets a hold of you though, you’re fucked, my friend.

WAIT NO I LIED:

LIFE GETS BETTER.

THEY HAVE ONE IN BLLLUUUEEEEE.

OH MY GOD IT’S LIKE ALL MY INTERESTS INTERSECTED AND EXPLODED INTO SOMETHING ABSOLUTELY AWESOME.

GUYS THIS IS, LIKE, THE END OF THE INTERNET. THERE IS NOTHING LEFT FOR ME HERE. EVERYTHING ELSE WILL BE A DISAPPOINTMENT. It was nice knowing you.

So I’m a huge fan of Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab, fine sellers of scents strange and esoteric. This is not by Black Phoenix Alechemy Lab. This is by some person on etsy and it might be dodgy as hell. BUT:

The BATMAN! scent is crafted with all of The Dark Knight’s best personality traits in mind. It is the scent of clean black linen and crisp city rain layered over rich notes of resinous amber, packed earth, and white musk and finished with a whisper of lotus. 

…I feel compelled. Seriously, if I hadn’t JUST gotten some BPAL stuff in yesterday, I would be hitting add to cart so hard reality would warp.

I love it’s finished with a whisper of lotus, whatever that means! Batman’s adventures in Asia are often so overlooked, and I feel like it’s a huge chunk of what he is. Plus, clean black linen—smelling like Bruce Wayne’s bed?

…compelling. Compelling.

THIS IS MY 100TH POST!

~party time~

I’m marking this momentous occassion by sharing something that isn’t technically Batman merch, but that Batman probably approves of.

What is DEFLEXION™ technology?

It sounds like something out of a comic book: a fabric that remains soft and flexible under normal conditions, but can absorb and disperse the shock of impact, protecting against damage and injury. Any superhero would want it, but it’s available to all. DEFLEXION™ technology from Dow Corning, a shock absorbing, high performance material, uses silicone technology to create unique impact protection solutions. DEFLEXION™ technology was previously known under the non-branded name active protection system (APS).

Basically, this is real life super hero armor. ISN’T THAT AWESOME? THAT’S TOTALLY AWESOME.

I’m linking to the website, but I can’t horrify you all with prices because I’m not even sure how the hell you buy this stuff even if you’re a billionaire playboy with a paypal account.

GUUUYYYSSS

IT’S AN ACTUAL HONEST TO GOD UTILITY BELT. GUUUYS. HOW IS THAT ANYTHING LESS THAN AWESOME? IT ISN’T. IT IS ENTIRELY AWESOME.

Do you have any idea how often I’ve been out, say, clubbing, in a tiny skintight nothing that certainly doesn’t have pockets, having handed my phone and photo ID off to other people for safe keeping, and I’ve thought, “what I really need is a utility belt”? SO OFTEN.

This could only be improved by being offered in bright yellow, but classic black is good too.